Not Sure Where to Start? Here’s What to Do When You Know You Need a Therapist

Realizing you need a therapist is a brave and important first step toward taking care of your mental and emotional well-being. However, figuring out what to do when you know you need a therapist can feel confusing and even a little intimidating. You might wonder where to start, should you search online, ask friends or family for recommendations, or check with your doctor? You might also worry about costs, insurance coverage, or whether you’ll connect with the therapist you choose. These are completely normal concerns, and you’re not alone in feeling this way.

The good news is that finding the right therapist doesn’t have to be overwhelming. With the right approach, you can move from uncertainty to clarity, taking confident steps toward getting the support you need. In this guide, we’ll break down the process in a clear, simple, and practical way so you know exactly where to begin, what to look for, and how to make choices that work best for your needs and situation.

Start by Understanding Why You Want Therapy

Before looking for a therapist, take a few minutes to understand why you’re seeking help. Ask yourself:

 Not Sure Where to Start? Here’s What to Do When You Know You Need a Therapist

  • Are you feeling anxious or stressed more than usual?
  • Do you feel stuck in your personal or professional life?
  • Are you struggling with grief, relationships, or past trauma?
  • Are you having a hard time sleeping, focusing, or enjoying things you used to love?

Knowing your reasons doesn’t mean you need to have everything figured out. It just helps narrow the kind of support you might need whether it’s talk therapy, trauma therapy, or something else.

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Decide What Type of Therapy Might Work for You

There are different types of therapy, and understanding them can make your search easier. Here are a few common options:

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Great for anxiety, depression, and thought patterns that hold you back.
  • Psychodynamic Therapy: Focuses on your past and how it shapes your present.
  • Humanistic Therapy: Encourages self-growth, self-worth, and living in the moment.
  • EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing): Often used for trauma and PTSD.

You don’t have to be an expert in therapy types. But reading a little about each can help you recognize what might feel right for your needs.

Look at Your Budget and Coverage

Therapy doesn’t have to break the bank, but it’s important to understand what you can afford.

Not Sure Where to Start? Here’s What to Do When You Know You Need a Therapist

  • With Insurance: Check your provider’s website or call to ask what mental health services are covered. Many plans cover several sessions a year.
  • Without Insurance: Look for sliding scale therapists who adjust their fees based on your income. Some therapy apps or community mental health centers offer affordable options.
  • Online Therapy: Options like BetterHelp, Talkspace, and others offer monthly plans and are often more affordable than in-person sessions.

Start with what’s financially possible for you right now. The goal is progress, not perfection.

Use Trusted Places to Find a Therapist

Avoid getting lost in Google. Instead, use reliable platforms that connect you with verified professionals:

  • PsychologyToday.com: You can filter by location, budget, specialization, insurance, and more.
  • TherapyDen.com: A helpful platform with inclusive filters for LGBTQ+ therapists, cultural background, and more.
  • Open Path Collective: Offers low-cost sessions for those without insurance.
  • Local Clinics or Hospitals: Many have mental health services or can refer you to someone who fits your needs.

Also, don’t overlook asking for recommendations from someone you trust. Sometimes a friend, doctor, or even your workplace wellness program can help guide you.

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Schedule a Free Consultation First

Most therapists offer a free phone call or virtual consultation before starting sessions. This is your chance to ask questions and see how you feel talking to them.

Not Sure Where to Start? Here’s What to Do When You Know You Need a Therapist

Here are a few questions you can ask:

  • What is your experience working with clients who face [insert your concern]?
  • How would you describe your therapy style?
  • What would the first few sessions look like?
  • What’s your availability like, and do you offer in-person or online sessions?

If something feels off or you don’t feel heard, that’s okay. You don’t have to stick with the first therapist you find. The right fit matters.

Don’t Overthink the First Session

Once you’ve found someone who feels right, schedule your first session. Don’t worry about saying the perfect thing or having it all together. A therapist’s job is to help guide the process.

In that first session, expect to:

  • Share a little about why you’re seeking therapy
  • Answer some background or health questions
  • Talk about your goals or what you’d like to improve
  • Ask questions about how the process works

The first session is about building trust, not solving everything at once. Be open, and take things at your own pace.

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Give It Time and Be Honest With Yourself

Therapy isn’t always instant relief, it’s a process. Some sessions may feel light, others emotional. But with consistency, you’ll start to notice progress.

Here’s what helps:

  • Be honest: Say what’s really on your mind, even if it’s uncomfortable.
  • Be consistent: Regular sessions help build momentum.
  • Be patient: Healing takes time, and growth often happens in small steps.

If after a few sessions it doesn’t feel like a good match, it’s okay to try someone else. The most important part is not giving up on the support you need.

Feeling unsure is normal. The path to healing doesn’t have to be confusing or scary. If you’re reading this, you’ve already taken the most important first step, knowing you need support. Now, take the next one. Find someone who listens, understands, and helps you grow.

You don’t have to do it alone and you don’t have to figure everything out today. One small step at a time is still progress.

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